Ah, Valentine’s Day. The Hallmark holiday in which red roses and heart-shaped balloons leave many singles bitter, and overpriced prix fixe meals leave many couples feeling less than satisfied.
As kids, those of us attending public schools long awaited the day that accompanied shoeboxes full of cartoon Valentines from our classmates; those in Jewish day schools grew up without this annual tradition.
So what’s the deal? Are Jews not allowed to celebrate Valentine’s Day?
Some calendars still refer to the holiday as St. Valentine’s Day and February 14th has traditionally been associated with Christianity. But is it actually a religious holiday?
One of the most universally accepted explanations of where the holiday was derived is the legend of a holy priest and 3rd-century romantic named Valentine, who continued to perform wedding ceremonies for young soldiers and their sweethearts even after the Roman emperor Claudius II forbid them to be betrothed. Valentine was imprisoned and sentenced for execution on February 14th, whereupon he penned a farewell letter to his own sweetheart and signed it, “From your Valentine.”
A-ha! So that explains the cards. And Valentine was once memorialized as a saint. But in 1969, the Catholic Church removed Valentine’s Day from its calendar as all they could historically corroborate about him was his burial date—February 14th. Thus, although it evokes the legend of a saint, Valentine’s Day is not officially recognized as a religious holiday—but that doesn’t mean you’ll find a synagogue decorated in red hearts and Cupid’s arrows any time soon.
A quick Internet search on Jews and Valentine’s Day yielded the following: Orthodox rabbis advised not to participate in Valentine’s Day traditions because of the holiday’s association with the saint (as well as some less-than-savory pagan rituals), while Conservative and Reformed rabbis leaned towards, “Sure, it’s okay to buy your significant other flowers and chocolates in celebration of your love—on February 14th and any other day of the year.”
But most often, the rabbis I found online re-directed the conversation to a Jewish holiday that’s become associated with the same sentiments of love of romance: Tu B’Av. Held each year on the 15th day of the Jewish month of Av (this year falling on July 21st), this Day of Love is mentioned in the Talmud as a celebration at the beginning of the grape harvest, in which all the unmarried girls in Jerusalem would dress in white and dance in the vineyards awaiting male suitors.
Though this ritual didn’t quite survive the destruction of the Second Temple, many modern-day Israeli Jews treat the holiday as, for lack of a better term, a Jewish Valentine’s Day, sharing flowers, romantic dinners and even proposing marriage on Tu B’Av.
So where does this leave us? As for me, I’m probably still going to go out and buy my guilty-pleasure candy hearts, much to my dentist’s chagrin. But maybe I’ll take a hint from those rabbis whose advice I found online and mark my calendar for July 21st, when the price of roses and chocolates won’t be marked up, and when I can offer a genuine profession of love to my husband—minus the cheesy greeting card.
FAQs
A quick Internet search on Jews and Valentine's Day yielded the following: Orthodox rabbis advised not to participate in Valentine's Day traditions because of the holiday's association with the saint (as well as some less-than-savory pagan rituals), while Conservative and Reformed rabbis leaned towards, “Sure, it's ...
Do Jews believe in Valentine's day? ›
As orthodox Jews don't commemorate Christian holidays like Valentine's Day and as it is too good a holiday to miss the Jews have their own day for celebrating love. In Hebrew numbers are marked by letters so “15” is the Hebrew letters?
What does Valentine's day have to do with the Bible? ›
Valentine's Day is a peculiar Christian holiday not mentioned in the New Testament—unsurprisingly, as it was instituted in honor of a third-century c.e. “saint” named Valentine.
What is the dark history of Valentine's day? ›
One Valentine was a priest in third-century Rome who defied Emperor Claudius II after the ruler outlawed marriage for young men. St. Valentine would perform marriages in secret for young lovers, ultimately leading to his death.
What is the real story behind Valentine's day? ›
Turns out, it was a pretty common name during Late Antiquity. As far as anyone can tell, the Saint Valentine of Valentine's Day was one of two guys preaching the good word in Rome in the third century. One of these two was martyred on February 14th 269, thus giving us the date for his eponymous day.
Is Valentines day a thing in Israel? ›
Israelis celebrate Valentine's Day—a foreign date for the day of love, but Jewish tradition also has a holiday that is all about love: the 15th day of the holiday of Av, also known as Tu Be'Av - ט”ו באב.
What do Christians say about Valentine's day? ›
But the biblical pattern teaches us that romantic love between husband and wife should be on display often and much. It isn't that celebrating Valentine's Day is too much; it is too little and weak. Christians, live your married years so that you don't need Valentine's Day.
What is the Hebrew meaning of Valentine's day? ›
Tu B'Av (Hebrew: ט״ו באב, lit. 'fifteenth of Av') is a minor Jewish holiday. In modern-day Israel, it is celebrated as a holiday of love (חג האהבה Ḥag HaAhava). It has been said to be an auspicious day for weddings.
What is the spiritual truth about Valentine's day? ›
Valentine's Day celebrated on the 14th of February every year is a day to celebrate love and affection. The day has roots in the Roman festival of Lupercalia, which honored the god Lupercus. The day is also linked to the Feast of St. Valentine, a Christian feast day that honors a third-century saint.
Is Valentine recorded in the Bible? ›
Valentine's Day isn't directly mentioned in the Bible, but any Christian knows that the scriptures are, in their entirety, “the greatest love story ever told.”
Valentine's Day is widely believed to have began with the martyrdom of three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus in Rome during the 3rd century. This Roman version is linked to a pagan festival known as Lupercalia, which was celebrated on or around February 15.
What color to wear on Valentine's day? ›
What are the Valentine's Day colors? Pop into any flower shop or even a festive hotel or restaurant and there's no arguing that red, white, and pink are the official colors of Valentine's Day.
What is the mystery behind Valentine's day? ›
According to NPR, Emperor Claudius II of Rome executed two different men named Valentine on February 14 (in two different years) during the third century. One account of St. Valentine says that he was a priest who was arrested for defying a Roman decree that forbade soldiers from marrying.
What is the deeper meaning of Valentine's day? ›
It originated as a Christian feast day honoring a martyr named Valentine, and through later folk traditions it has also become a significant cultural, religious and commercial celebration of romance and love in many regions of the world. Valentine's Day. A Valentine's card, c.
What does the Bible say about Valentine's day? ›
1 John 4:7-12. Dear friends: let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.
What is the actual point of Valentine's day? ›
St Valentine's Day is an annual festival to celebrate romantic love, friendship and admiration. Every year on 14 February people celebrate this day by sending messages of love and affection to partners, family and friends.
Which religions don t celebrate valentines day? ›
On a 2018 online survey, it was found that 68% of the respondents did not wish to celebrate Valentine's Day. It can be also observed that different religious groups, including Hindu, Muslim and Christian people of India do not support Valentine's Day.
Do Jews celebrate birthdays? ›
Do Jewish people celebrate birthdays? Yes, typically, Jews recognize that people are born on a certain date and that date returns year after year, at which point people become 'a year older'. In fact, MOST Jews actually celebrate that event with small gifts and perhaps, parties.
Do Muslims have Valentine's day? ›
Valentine's Day is nonexistent in Islam, for good reason too. It has nothing to do with worshipping or thanking God. It has pagan roots that trace to the Roman festival of Lupercalia.
Is Valentine's day a pagan belief? ›
Valentine's Day is widely believed to have began with the martyrdom of three different saints named Valentine or Valentinus in Rome during the 3rd century. This Roman version is linked to a pagan festival known as Lupercalia, which was celebrated on or around February 15.
